


les écritures

by ladyamesindy



Series: Copains de Combat [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Drabbles, Français | French, Kissing, M/M, Storms, writing prompts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 07:13:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29006619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyamesindy/pseuds/ladyamesindy
Summary: A series of writing prompts, drabbles and other writings involving Alexandre Shepard and Kaidan Alenko that have no other home.mShenkoFrench Shepard   Spacer/War Hero/Adept
Relationships: Kaidan Alenko/Male Shepard
Series: Copains de Combat [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2065818
Kudos: 3





	les écritures

**Author's Note:**

> writing prompt = why do you walk around as if you’re somehow less valuable than the rest of the world?
> 
> Huge thanks to [potionsmaster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/potionsmaster/pseuds/potionsmaster) for betaing this piece for me!

_2178, Alenko orchard, BC Interior_

It astounds Alexandre that he and Kaidan were able to get shore leave at the same time yet again. After the last time, he thought it might be impossible. Sure, the Skyllian Blitz was far from their fault, but the Alliance is not known for their sense of humor, dry or not. Then again, just how ‘wild’ could the interior of Canada be in the middle of winter? Certainly not on the same level as the Blitz. Right?

It has been a long time since Alexandre last visited the Alenko orchard, and so much has happened since then. And though it was only a short stay last time – just under a year – he did fall in love with the place. The scenic views. Kaidan’s welcoming family. The instant acceptance of him and his biotics without question; such a different experience with family than his mother and brother, one that left him with a far greater appreciation for family. 

Since his enlistment, however, finding opportunity to return has not been easy. Add to that, he is used to being on ships, traveling the galaxy, no ties to any one place. So, the idea of returning to BC to visit is difficult to process for him, more so because, unless Kaidan is with him it doesn’t feel right. Then again, the only time they have been able to get leave together before now they were both deployed. Elysium was closer, relatively inexpensive, and someplace new worth exploring and experiencing. Had he known how it would turn out, he might have made more of an effort to head back to Earth instead.

This time around, however, they head _home._ Kaidan arrives first, a day ahead of Alexandre, so when Shepard lands at the transport station in Kamloops the next day, he is met by all three Alenkos. As before, he is welcomed with open arms, quite literally, and all of this despite his current disreputable-looking condition. Logan and Nathalie cannot hide a startled expression at first, but he reassures them all is well, he is fine and very grateful to have leave among friends. Kaidan hides his reaction better, though Alexandre still notes a tightness at the corner of his eyes. He does not make a big deal of it, quietly asking as they climb into the back of the skycar, “Migraine?”

Kaidan shakes his head, raising a finger to trace the new N7 insignia on Alexandre’s collar tab. The same finger slips beneath the material, brushing against an inch-long medigel-covered wound. “I want to ask how things went, but I know you can’t talk about them.”

Alexandre chuckles softly, tiredly, but grasps his hand, pulling it away and squeezing gently. “All that matters is the outcome, is it not?”

Kaidan’s lips press into a thin line. “You look half-starved!”

“I am _fine_ , _mon_ _é_ _toile,**_ I promise!” 

Alexandre does, however, lie his head on Kaidan’s shoulder as Logan Alenko guides them in the direction of the orchard. Though he expects Kaidan to continue the discussion, he does not, and Alexandre is able to fall into a light doze until they pull up in front of the house. Stretching and yawning as he exits the vehicle, he grabs his duffle and heads inside the house and up to his old room, one that, Nathalie assures him, is just as he left it.

For the rest of that afternoon and over the next couple of days, Alexandre settles back into civilian life. It takes a bit of time to get used to, especially after the trials of completing his N7 training, but there is no pressure, no tension, nothing like what he would have faced with his mother and brother. More importantly, he has time to simply _be_ with Kaidan. Whether assisting around the orchard or the house or relaxing together, just being in proximity to his partner brings with it a comfort he has sorely missed.

But this comfort, he notices early on, may only be one sided. While they do spend time together, and outwardly appearances seem normal, Alexandre senses something troubling Kaidan. At first, he says nothing; after being apart for so long, it takes time to become familiar with one another again, he understands this. And yet, when their fourth day, nearly half of their leave, passes and he it feels as if a wall is growing between them, Alexandre decides it is time to talk.

That evening, he finds Kaidan sitting on the porch swing watching as a summer storm blows through the area. Rain and wind, occasional flickers of lightning, but nothing so severe to warrant an immediate retreat indoors, Alexandre joins him.

The swing drifts lazily, barely moving as Kaidan’s arm rests along the back edge, his head upon the arm. Alexandre settles in the space behind him. “I have brough tea, _mon_ _é_ _toile,_ ” he murmurs quietly, gently nudging the mug against his arm. 

Kaidan half-turns to take it from him, but says nothing. Not even offering thanks. This is when Alexandre knows something serious is wrong. He sips at his own mug and listens to the rain fall and the occasional crack of thunder. Having grown up on ships most of his life, it fascinates him and finds he misses it when he is not around it. It soothes him in ways he cannot explain. 

After a few minutes, after attempting to slide his hand around Kaidan’s shoulder as he leans closer only to have the other man pull stiffly away, Alexandre remains silent no longer. “What is it, Kaidan?”

Kaidan says nothing, staring out across the yard to the rows of trees beyond.

It tests the limits of Alexandre’s patience, yet if anyone can get away with it, it is Kaidan. “ _Mon_ _é_ _toile?_ Talk to me, _s’il te plait_.”**

A sigh, heavy with regret and reluctance, escapes the man’s lips. “What do you want me to say?”

“I wish for you to tell me what troubles you,” Alexandre replies quietly, honestly. Again, he attempts to slide his arm around Kaidan to join their hands. This time, Kaidan accepts it, lacing their fingers together. Alexandre slides closer behind him, resting his elbow on the back of the swing and holding his tea off to the side so as not to spill it on him. “Why is it you walk around as if you think you are somehow less valuable than the rest of the world?”

Kaidan stiffens, the hold on Alexandre’s hand tightening briefly, almost painfully, as if guilt or shame guides him now. Alexandre presses a light kiss at the edge of the neck of Kaidan’s t-shirt, just where the neck and shoulder join. Kaidan sips quietly at his tea, stares out across the yard, eventually inhaling deeply and releasing the tension within as he exhales. “You always could see right through me.”

Alexandre smiles against his skin. “As you can me,” he points out. “If our positions were reversed, would you not call me out?”

“I don’t deserve you.”

Alexandre does not even acknowledge that comment, instead repeating, “ _Qu’est-ce qui se passe?”**_

A bright flash of lightning, nearly blinding in intensity, arcs across the sky. Within a second or two, a violent wave of thunder shakes the earth beneath and the air around them. In that one moment, Alexandre feels a tremor skitter across his partner’s shoulders. “Kaidan?”

“Akuze,” he whispers tightly. “It’s still Akuze.”

Carefully, Alexandre sets both mugs aside so they do not spill. When this is done, he wraps both arms around Kaidan, resting his chin on one shoulder, hugging him close. “What about it?”

Another shudder. This time when he speaks, Kaidan’s voice cracks. “I … can’t. Alex, it isn’t fair to you!” He turns, facing him at long last but averting his eyes. 

One dark eyebrow arches in surprise. “ _Pourquoi?_ ”** Reaching out, Alexandre gently nudges Kaidan beneath his chin, urging him to look up at him. “Have we not agreed to share everything with the other?”

Sniffling softly, Kaidan nods. “But we aren’t –.”

Dipping his head lower, he presses a light kiss to Kaidan’s cheek. “It has not stopped you before,” he insists, “nor has it stopped me in past.” Kaidan lifts his head, slowly lifting his eyes so they meet. Alexandre smiles and frames his face with his hands. “I am here for you, _mon_ _é_ _toile_ , however, whenever you may need me _._ ”

Kaidan traces his finger over the now mostly-healed wound on Alexandre’s neck. “But you are still recovering from your last mission!”

“All the more reason to know I can handle whatever you have to tell me,” Alexandre insists. “Trust me.”

“I do!” 

Thunder rumbles around them again, the wind gaining strength as rain picks up tempo, heedless of what is in the way. Neither of them pay it any attention. Instead, Kaidan’s arms slide around Alexandre’s chest, pulling him as close as he can, holding on like one desperately holding onto life. It is not unfamiliar, having been the same reaction he displayed after being rescued off Akuze the year before. Patient as always, Alexandre moves willingly, allowing the other man to guide him as he needs. It is some time before Kaidan relents, quietly whispering. Once he starts, however, he keeps going until he releases it all, including the tension that acts as a wall between them. By that time, the storm is well past, the sun is set and above them, the skies shine brightly. Wrapped around the other, they stare up at the night sky in silence, savoring the closeness. 

“That one,” Alexandre murmurs near Kaidan’s ear, lifting their joint hands and pointing towards one star. “One day, you and I will go to that system together. On a mission.”

Kaidan chuckles softly. “For what purpose.”

Alexandre smiles against his ear, replying, “Why, to save the galaxy, of course.”

Kaidan’s hand tightens. “I think I would prefer shore leave …”

**Author's Note:**

> **mon étoile = literally, “my star,” a term of endearment
> 
> **s’il te plait = if you please
> 
> ** Qu’est-ce qui se passe = what happened
> 
> **Pourquoi = why


End file.
